School Vacation week!  You know what that means…it’s tough to get in a lot of practice time, there are all sorts of new people at the lanes, and the lanes behave a little differently league night than on a normal week.  So make an adjustment, people!  Everyone has the same conditions, go execute your shot better than the other guys and get a win.

Waldorf is busy doing it like they do it in Tampa (baby!), so he’s out this week.  Hard to get these done for every match, so some are a bit shorter than normal.  Lets get to the early matches, but before we do, in honor of President’s Week, please rise for our National Anthem:

Did they audition her at all before that?  Or just listen to some old Black Eyed Peas records and figured she’d be great??

Spare of the Dog (-1) v. Bowled and Beautiful – My team bowled against Spare of the Dog last week, and for whatever reason they don’t have their usual mojo.  But they committed to doing a team dinner this week to rally the troops, and I’d say it went very well.  Here we see the team wrapping it up and Probie extending a special thanks to host Yao Romo after beating him in a game of Sorry:

What’s going on with B&B?  Beaujolais and company are averaging less than 600 as a team, which is not normal for them.  Something has to change…maybe Mr. Mayor’s 200 last week is a sign of good things to come? Ruby Canary still leads the team in average, but they’ll need some above average rolling to get the win in this one, and this isn’t the week for above average rolling.  I’ll take the Dogs in a close one.

DHD (-9) v. 5 Finger Discount – Great rebound week for DHD.  After losing to LOS in a match where they rolled tight in game 1, they will get to relax and crush 5 Finger this week.  Last week the power couple Doc Moose and Lil Pickle had free bowling…and you know they took advantage of that!  Those guys are in there every day.  Word of warning, that can lead to injury, just ask Tango or Cheese.

Speaking of the power couple, here are Doc and Pickle in their earlier days of power coupling before discovering Bowling:

5 Finger are having a tough go of it, and this won’t help…DHD will crush ‘em.  But fear not, Dutch, we still love your beer!  Here is a quick clip of Dutch at his first day of work at Maine Beer:

BUI (-3) v. Touch My Xcite – Is trouble brewing in paradise for Touch?  A rumored benching of Uno last week may be causing waves, and now they get a BUI team that is piling up wins.  Duke Thunderwood has been strengthening up his hands rubbing down various members of BoPo (and his own member, truth be told), and his bowling scores are looking mighty strong as a result.  BUI will win this one, and I like their chances at a good seed going into the playoffs.

Guacabowle (-5) v. Tattoos and Titties – Guacabowle has 2 of the top 10 bowlers on Thursday in Mitch Cumstein and Sparetime, but still have a losing record:

Thankfully, they get the win tonight and should be getting their record back to 500 (I am giving them the win against GOB where they are up 7-3 after 2….their lanes broke last week so they couldn’t finish, but whenever they make it up, they will get 1 point for the win).

Tattoos and Titties are not having a great year.  Slugga is leading the way with a couple 200’s on the year, but the rest of the squad isn’t posting huge scores.  To put it in perspective, if Dick Whitman were on T&T he would be their lead bowler…Dick Whitman!!  Great news on the T&T front in Rubbys and Red Empire are recently married, so they are basking in the glow of their recent nuptials.  Apparently that glow isn’t helping their bowling scores, though.  Quick honeymoon footage from their trip to Hawaii when they went ATV’ing with some friends:

I’d like to take this opportunity to publicly ask Badger to start rolling like the good bowler he is.  Is it too loud?  Too many beers?  What is it?  Badger, this is for you:

PS – Still waiting for my Guacabowle team meeting invite…

Bowlderdash (-5) v. Bad News Spares – Bad News Spares jumped out to a 5-0 last week, but gave up the last 10 in a loss.  They don’t get a lot of chances for a win, and this week won’t be one of them.  Bowlderdash is hanging on to the last B Playoffs spot, and will take care of business tonight.

Pinups (-5) v. Pud’s Taxi – We saw MacBalls and Lil Lane Master getting in some practice over the weekend, and let me tell you how well practice works:

Which is why I don’t go to Bayside to practice….I come to the lanes to see friends, have a few beers, a few laughs, and then sometimes I bowl a little bit.  Pinups will take this one to stay in the hunt for a playoff spot.

Don’t think Pud’s Taxi is a pushover.  They have a team average only 3 pins off of ICBING who are 3-3, and far higher than the other teams in B without a win.  They will get theirs, but not this week.


Leisure Rolls (-3) v. Lion’s Den – Ricky Passion is back from missing last week’s match due to some domestic responsibilities, and he will bring a higher than normal energy this week.  Das Ducken is starting to get a little cranky at the baby in her belly messing up her bowling form, but Mokiki has been rolling inspired by the confirmation that his parts are all working.

I don’t think of Seinfeld as a horribly dated show, but regular def clips are tough on the eyes…why don’t they just draw it in crayon, that would be clearer than that!

Insanal is rolling like a stud lately, D$ is great, Magic has a few 200s now, and Hard Knox is their LMA (Low Male Average).  Huh?  When he showed up to BoPo a few years ago he was a stud for DHD, now he’s LMA for Leisure Rolls?!  These guys are better than I realized, so I think I should start saying nice things about them in advance of our match next Friday.

I see Lion’s Den getting the low points, but Leisure Rolls getting the high points and total in a 9-6 final.

******  MATCH OF THE NIGHT *******

YB2 (-3) v. LOS – Just one week after taking care of DHD, it gets no easier for LOS who will have to contend with YB2 this week.  A late match, but word on the street is that LOS will have the full squad there, with the possible exception of Ho-Town.  So this is a powerhouse match of Glossy and Crackerjack v. Cheese and Precious….Stiffy and Ho-Town v. ITZ and Pistol Pete….Strike Dancer and #s Vag v. Milli Rocket and All Day Lemay.

It’s that last matchup that skews heavily for the YB2 team, and I think that will be the difference in the match.

Precious had a crazy good week last week with a 734 series.  That won’t continue this week with the expected lane conditions, but LOS will get some top points, some middle points, and no low points.

This one will go a long ways to determine who will be top seed out of Thursday A.  YB2 has DHD next week, so a solid couple of weeks put them at the top of the Thursday A ladder.  ITZ even made a music video about it:

Sweet crocs, ITZ!

FC Portland (-3) v. Strike City – If you bowl next to this match, prepare for some noise.  Prepare for distraction.  Prepare for this:

FC Portland will take care of business in this one, and have a blast doing it.  Strike City will just have a blast.  I love the fun that they bring to BoPo.

Happy Hands (-3) v. Granola Rollahs – Mookie Oak had a nice podcast shout out for her 200 recently.  Granola got their first win of the year last week, getting rid of the zero in the win column is a good thing, and will have to suffice for this week as Happy Hands gets the win.

Did a quick check in with Kid Loose about his season, and he shared with me this video from his break dancing days:

So I guess his season is flexible?…and awesome!

Lesbowlians (-3) v. ICBING – Aaargh, I never know how to predict a Lesbowlian match.  Every time they should win, they struggle.  Then we forget about them, and they start beating everyone.  ICBING is busy breaking new bowlers into the league, and Rocky Balbowla should be gone at sea so they will not have the depth to keep up with Lesbowlians.  End of the day I am going with the team with a 20 pin team average advantage, so I predict the Lesbowlians will take ICBING to Candy Mountain.

Party Mix (-1) v. Pinny Candy – This is a big match in B, featuring the 2nd and 3rd place teams in the division.  Pinny Candy holds a small team average advantage, and Dots just had a big game.  But this one is late, the lanes will be squirrely, and that will be enough to disrupt Pinny Candy and have them bring that B-minus game like all the other teams Party Mix has played.   For sure this will be a one sided dance party, sort of like this clip:

In the end, I see Party Mix squeaking by for a close win.  If that occurs, it really puts them in a good place for the B playoffs.  A loss and things will get VERY interesting for the B spots from Thursday.

I’ll leave you with the first tune I ever danced to with my lady…hey man, it was a different time, at the QE2 in Albany, NY in 1990….I am a sucker for blonde on black!