Starting to get a little separation, but it’s still early.  The championship fund is up to $136.  Keep playing the 50/50, particularly if you believe in your team.  Would be fun to get that prize pool up over $750 - that would add some sweet pressure to the finals!

Bowler of the Week - Double Cheese, Drive Thrus

Two 200+ games to help the Drive Thrus pick up an important 6.5 points.  He seems to be thriving playing alongside Cheddar, and the two of them rank 3/4 in the league after two weeks.  Not a bad start.

Team of the Week - Autodraft

Get used to this one.  Back to back weeks with the top score.  Stevie Strikes continues to stroke it and put up 2 more 200+ games and is #1 in the league in average.  T-$ rebounded from a rough game one to put up a 238 made even cooler since it included a gutterball in the middle of a run of strikes.  He also held on to the #2 spot in the standings.  The captain, Lt. Striker, joined the party this week averaging over 160, and Barry Violet also averaged 160.  With Layne being Layne, they don’t seem to have any weaknesses.  I’m glad we already played them.

Game of the Week: Four Boobs and Some Nutz 8.5 - Drive Thrus 6.5

With her team trailing 6-4, La Gatita did not dwell on her tough start.  Instead she rallied to a game high 225 to take top point over Double Cheese, and teammate Walter followed suit to take 2nd place.  Sometimes a team just needs to see its captain step up to rally the spirit, and it certainly worked in this one.

So, Bubbles and Barry Violet are being flown to NYC tonight to be on Anderson Cooper’s new talk show tomorrow morning.  Not sure if they will discuss BowlPortland, but they will be there.  I don’t think it will affect the lines too much.

Team GB (-5) vs XX Chance Missed: Team GB won 10-5. XX lost 10-5.  I’m going to go the easy route and say the pattern continues.  Gutterboy will light up the lanes tomorrow, and both Baeujolais and Rufio looked strong in their debuts.  All Nuber One does is win championships.  Natro and Hot Mango started strong for XX, but they’ll need much more from Tron and Pinfall Wizard.

Autodraft (-6) vs Chemical Sweatpants: Barry Violet (Autodraft) and Bubbles (Sweats) should miss this game for their CNN debuts, but even if they were around the situation would change little.  Stevie Strikes and T-$ are 1-3 in the league after a week and that’s no fluke.  Their ladies, Sheri Balljammer and Chernobyl Layne, averaged a 144 between them.  This team is tough.  Only Slow Roll played well in week one for the Sweatpants, but Tso, Cookie and Hungus have looked good all week in practice.  Can they do it in a game against the top team in the league?  Looks like too high a hill to climb.

Dick’s Picks (-3) vs Shot Pot Honey: It’s kind of interesting having 4 teams miss the playoffs.  Certainly raises the stakes for getting some points.  These two teams were the low point getteres in week one and would love to get back on track in week 2.  #1 overall draft pick Diesel’s ankle should be down to grapefruit size from watermelon, so he will definitely improve on his 157 average.  Likewise, Dick Liquor is not going to average 115 very often.  I think they both rebound, but Dick’s has a bit more depth.

Drive Thrus (-3) vs 4 Boobs and Some Balls:  Cheddar doesn’t like losing.  Cheddar wants more strikes.  Cheddar is coming for you.  La Gatita and her Saucy Posse pals will need to step up their game in preparation for and angry Cheddar, Double Cheese and McBooth.  Who’s hungry?

Das Boot (-1) vs Xander’s Rolls: Pauly Ringwald is making his case to get on a BoPo team.  He’s proven he can roll, but how is he at drinking?  He and Mr. Stiffy are a strong 1-2 punch.  They are a classic matchup for Oz and Shifter Pawl of the Rolls.

Felt like old times last night.  12 teams going at it, BoPo faces everywhere, breakdancing, drinking, you name it.  Draft League 2011 is up and running and while it was incredible fun there is no doubt it was also challenging.  These teams are thrown together by the winds of fate (and drafting), and we at Bayside made an oiling error that led to some pretty low scores.  A few people fought through it and put up good numbers, but nothing like we had seen in here over the last few weeks of practice.

Bowler of the Week, Bustah Nut - Green Bowl Packers

While Stevie Strikes edged Bustah’s average by a point, Bustah did it over three games as compared to 2, and did it when his captain was having an off night to lead his team to a 12.5-2.5 win.  Bustah powered his way to a very nice 225-194-216 series.  His captain Jerk probably won’t ever put up a 147 average again, so this team looks like a powerhouse.

Team of the Week - Autodraft

When Lt. Striker missed the draft the assembled 11 minds at the table picked for him, just giving him the proverbial ‘best player available’ each round.  Well, 11 minds are apparently better than 1.  Autodraft’s 1-2 punch of Stevie Strikes (213 avg) and T-$ (201.5 avg) looks mighty strong.  Cherobyl Layne gives them another solid roller, and the depth they have with Barry Violet, Lt. Striker, Sherri Balljammer and Lil’ Bowl Peep is impressive.

Game of the Week - Catalina Wine Mixer 9.5 - Drive Thrus 5.5

Yeah, that’s actually the closest score there was on a night of blowouts.  This new twist of 4 teams missing the playoffs definitely adds some juice to the games as every point is critical.  This game was back and forth with Catalina off to the early 5-0 lead after Precious held on to edge Cheddar for top point in game 1.  The Drive Thru’s roared back with a sweep of their own in game 2 as Double Cheese smacked down his BoPo teammate Precious with a 199 to lead the way.  In game three the pendulum swung back the other way, with Catalina grabbing 4.5 after Shithawk tied Cheddar for top point.

Stats and Standings are up on the side of the page.  See y’all next week!

Congratulations Off Constantly on your second title.  OC stormed out to a 4-1 lead, pushed it to 7-3, then held on for a thrilling 8-7 win.  What a game, what a night!  Thank you everyone for making it incredible.

At 8:30 on Thursday, there were four teams in the running for the finals. One was a startup; another a reconfigured team with already a banner on the wall. The other two teams were original BoPo. Both of which already had banners on the wall. Those two teams had the experience, they had the family mentality, and man did they bowl.

OC has been on fire all year long. After beating the number one seed, they are now itching to return to glory. The twins runneth over on the quest for this cup. They have the experience, the depth of bench, and enough lefties to make sure that they have the right people on the lanes to adapt to any lane conditions. Two friendlies on Thursday night made them used to beating teams that they liked.

BEER had a tougher way into the finals, and they are ready to prove that last year’s win was not just a fluke. They have the best bowler from the league, they have the brain behind this whole thing, and they have the Zen-est bowler this side of Binga’s. And they have already been through their grudge match with the other house team.

They both come into the finals with some questions. As usual, the finals will come down to the matchups. Will Cheddar’s lack of bowling for three weeks show? Can Oz regain his early season form when it matters to take the point? Are they just going to throw the same line as each other the whole night? Will we be able to hear the Cheddar’s pop over the sound of the screaming fans?

Will McQueen put his livelihood on the line when he comes up against his employer in the match, or will he fold? Is he going to be able to follow through into a column without fouling while picking up a 10 pin? What if there is no column there? And for that matter, can Hungus tear himself away from the lanes and let Lou take over so he can enjoy the match? Does Beatrix really want to watch her boss beat her man friend Off Constantly?

What will be the outcome of the battle of bartender charisma? Will the efficient style of Number One be able to hold up against said Zen-master and everyone’s favorite drink shaker player Filthy McNasty? Is Number One’s finger going to hold up? Is the lack of WMPG going to throw Filthy off?

Which lady from OC is going to “feel it”? Can either of them step up against BoPo darling and second best named Coco Lopez? Has Queen Bee recovered from her back injury, and will she step up like she did in last year’s finals? Are blondes really better bowlers?

And what about the bench? How many shots is Tom Richards going to take before his first rock, paper, scissors game? Does he realize that he always throws rock? Will he throw scissors? Will Filthy throw rock instead of paper, thinking that TR will throw scissors? Will Tron go all number two over TR?

What about Dick Liquor? How many games in before BEER sees The Dick? And how many times is he going to say that during the match? Is his turban going to break or is his ball going to break the ball return rack. How many times is the right amount of times to put your thumb in the ball before you throw? Four? Five?

Which teammate is going to return for the match? Is BOB going to cheer like one and a half people? Can OC get some voodoo love from New Orleans?

Those two families meet on Saturday night, on the lanes, with the fanfare, and the pressure and the love to decide which team will get that second banner. If I were a betting man, I would bet on the over on 14 shots of Tuaca, the over on two blackouts, and call a push on one incestual love fest the likes of which have yet to be seen. OC -1.

It’s time to dance. And answer some questions.

You like twins?  You’re in luck.  More of an ownership kiss-up? Plenty for you too.  Cheddar vs Oz? Check. Filthy, Coco Lopez, Queen Bee sexy dance sandwich?  Yep.  Number One “sexytime”? Count on it.  Finals.  7:30 start time on Saturday.  Be there or suck.

Well, the majority anyway.  Most of the 15 people who entered their brackets had these teams battling in the final 8 (though half did not put IBS there).  So, not a lot of mystery I guess.  The big mystery is how this 8-team music mashup is going to work.  Phish?  Orleans?  AC/DC? The Brothers Johnson?  It’s gonna get weird.

#1 Walkaways (-3) vs #9 Still L.O.S.: This one’s personal.  After last season’s semi-final loss, Natro and Coco bolted from L.O.S.  They added La Gatita from the controversial Urban Achievers and then signed Danny Diesel and Booth away from Binga’s.  Ali and Shithawk didn’t miss a beat, locking up Precious and then adding some extra height in Double Cheese, extra speed with Speedboat, and extra versatility with the ambidextrous Mr. Stiffy.  Now these teams will battle it out on the big stage.

Both teams cruised through Sweet 16 matchups with no trouble.  The Walkaways will be opening without Booth again, but that didn’t seem to be a problem yesterday.  They just need to keep from tightening up if they get off to a slow start.  Natro looked very strong last night, and Diesel is a very consistent anchor.  How will their arms be for 6 games, though, if they advance and have no subs?  Same goes for Gatita and Coco.  They have to get there first, though.

LOS has been the hottest team over the last month.  Mr. Stiffy has been dominant as a righthander, and Precious has regained his from.  The ladies put up some big playoff scores as well.  Shithawk may be the steadiest hand - he won’t be rattled, and he is very real.  He will swoop in on the Walkaways in an attempt to shit all over their title dreams. Double Cheese is the wildcard - the rookie with giant shoes to fill (literally).  Shithawk’s calming presence should get them through any early struggles, but they will need to land a big punch early.

#7 B.E.E.R. (-3) vs #2 Team Micaela: This one has been affected wildly be injuries and absences.  The league’s top average bowler, team Micaela’s Stevie Strikes, had another monster night on Tuesday, but will be gone for Thursday (and Saturday should TMC reach the finals).  Obviously losing your top bowler hurts any time, but the one possible silver lining is that TMC’s one blemish was losing their two big games.  Now they don’t have to worry about that - the pressure is off.  Not to mention they have Bama sitting there, who would be the number one on just about any team in the league.  Gutter Boy will need to step up his game as the number two.  After that it’s Teggi, Mona Laudley and Ralphie.  They should be pretty relaxed too, and will definitely be ready for the B.E.E.R. dance attack.

B.E.E.R. had been without their top bowler as well, Cheddar being out for three weeks with an elbow injury. Last night captain Hungus broke his vow to protect the injured star when his team stumbled out to a 4-1 deficit.  It was a panic move, but it paid off.  Cheddar got his stroke back by the end of the second game and if his elbow holds up looks like he could lead B.E.E.R. back to the finals.  Filthy and Coco Lopez have become great pair of rollers, feeding off each others’ energy.  Queen Bee is battling a back injury but is a gamer and will be ready for the showdown, and Tom Richards drove five and a half hours yesterday just to make it in time for game three.  That’s dedication from “Hacksaw”.  They have the experience and their star, and with TMC missing theirs,  should advance.

#3 Binga’s (-5) vs #6 I.B.S.: Binga’s got a scare last night.  They battled back from a 2-3 deficit to take a 7-3 lead, then put it on cruise control.  Problem was Saucy Posse kept fighting.  Heading into the 9th frame of game three, SauPo had all five points seemingly locked up.  When Jerk got a split, I was reaching for the marker to write in the winner on the big board.  Then he nailed the shot, “The Pickup”.  When Redonk left the 10th open, Jerk struck, which was enough to secure top point thanks to The Pickup. General Tso was the top roller, but was sitting out when the game 3 drama hit.  He is itching to get back on the lanes.  Cookie and PB &J have now been tested, and should be ready for whatever comes their way next.  Layne is always steady.

I.B.S. has overcome the doubters to reach the quarters, just as they expected.  They lost 11-4 in their first matchup with Binga’s, but that has little relevance in the playoffs.  That was pre-Killer B.  The mercenary B has been a big boost to Wut What’s squad, and Oolie has enjoyed the company.  The team is untested, with no veterans that have reached the final four, but they also don’t know they aren’t supposed to win, and that’s their advantage.  If the Ram Brothers catch fire (and I can’t wait to see what songs DJ Supertop Megacool submits) they could make a little noise.  SauPo’s near upset was probably bad luck for IBS as Binga’s is on full alert.

#5 Off Constantly (-5) vs #13 Nuts:  Number One vs Peanut, and Bustah vs the World.  This one has some fun side stories.  The Nuts were picked to get here, but have struggled a bit on the way.  They were locked in a 5-5 tie with Shambles in the first round, and fell down 4-1 to No-Eye-Deer last night.  Still, they’ve battled through it and gotten the game they’ve wanted all along against OC.  Herbie will have to be lights out to backup Bustah, and Peanut and Sugar will need to channel their all-star talents.  Either Salty or Smokey needs to stumble onto a monster game too.

OC dispatched of another brash opponent with ease, crushing Y&B in two games and watching The Truth fade into the ether.  They have “the look” right now.  None of them is stepping out as the leader, but they all are playing well.  At some point Oz will start rolling monsters again, and that could be a difference maker.  That’s perhaps what makes them so scary, Dick Liquor and the boys haven’t been bowling anywhere near their best and they are cruising.  Coucou and Honey Bunny are doing their part as well and the team is itching for a finals trip.  If they get through this one for a potential matchup versus the Walkaways, it would be one for the ages.

So, here’s the music plan for the rest of the season.  Atomik will be playing tonight.  All 8 teams that advance tonight can submit 5 songs.  I will put all 40 of those songs on a shuffled playlist for Thursday.  You can have your Sheryl Crow, or Herb Alpert or AC/DC.  You win, you choose.

If your match is already decided after two games, you are welcome to play a third game but do not have to.

One last rule thing before the previews, and everyone probably knows this but a reminder anyway.  If the ball comes out of the gutter and knocks some pins down, please fix the score and have the pins set up again - it doesn’t count.  Now, on to it.

6pm Games

#1 Walkaways (-9) vs #17 Gutterballs: The Walkaways were built to win a title, and they are so close now they can taste it.  Natro has been sketching pictures of the BoPo Cup with his name engraved on it all over his trapper keeper.  If only they could get Booth to buy in.  He has made up some cockamamie story about a ‘homebuyers’ class’ (who even buys homes anymore?) and will miss several games.  What’s the real story?  Danny Diesel is the only Walkaway with a championship so the team will look to him for leadership.  He has done the job all year, putting up big scores in big games.  La Gatita and Coco better bring their iron-arms as they will be playing a lot.

Give the Gutterballs this - they are game for the fight.  This team bonded in the pressure of “anonymous-gate’ and has a real us against the world attitude working for them right now.  Watch their fist pumps and air humps and you know they mean business.  Big Ed will be the punching bag tonight getting beat for top point most times, but he needs to keep those battles close while the rest of his teammates scratch out some points.  Gigi and Lolo need to hang int he 150’s and Rusty Nail has to channel 2010.  It likely won’t be enough but maybe they can force a game three.

#2 Team Michaela (-7) vs #18 TDYOB: There is a rumor floating around the lanes that Stevie Strikes will be leaving town on Thursday, thus missing the quarterfinals and any further games.  I can not conform or deny that rumor but I can elevate it to an internet rumor.  If true that could be a big blow to Micaela’s black and pink clad assassins.  Bama played back to back games Sunday to get to the Restaurant league finals, and it would be a tall order to have to play 7 matches in 7 days.  Maybe Gutter Boy, whose team lost in heartbreaking fashion in the restaurant league semis on Sunday, will channel his energy into BoPo and help make a run.

Unfortunately for TDYOB, this is just Tuesday.  Stevie Strikes will be here tonight for sure and the Dr’s incessant trash talk has him fired up.  TDYOB pulled off a stunning comeback victory in the first round, winning 8-7 after trailing 5-0 and 7-3.  Roy Munson set the tone with a dominating game three in the leadoff spot, and Stone Cold held off all challengers for the fourth point.  It was impressive stuff.  Stone Cold and Sneaky Pete have been putting up solid numbers, but Roy and the Dr would have to steal a few from Stevie and Bama to make this one close.  That and the Sheriff needs to have the game of his life.

#3 Binga’s (-3) vs #19 Saucy Posse: Game of the week.  It seems like BoPo has waited four years for SauPo to break out.  They always seem to have talent, but never pull it all together at the right moment.  Last year they finally got a playoff win.  This year they could go a lot further.  If they could pull the upset in this one they would be favored to reach their first Final Four.  What’s all the hype about?  New Papa Walter looked lights out in his return from paternity leave.  Hot Sauce has been excellent every other week, and after a down week last week, that puts him on pace to go off tonight.  Redonk is the hardest player to figure in the whole league.  No one would be surprised if he averaged 180 tonight, but a 120 wouldn’t shock anyone either.  Kathy Nash looked excellent last week and hopes to build on it.  They will need Special Sauce and Tallywagger to have career games if they play.  It could be done, but SauPo will need to be at their best.

Binga’s has the feel of a team that will do what it needs to do to win and not show anything more than they have to.  Jerk will battle Walter all night, and I’d pick him to take two out of those three battles if he goes three.  Hot Mango has been here before and doens’t mind the spotlight.  Same for Chernobyl.  Now is the time for league rookies Cookie, General Tso and PB &J to make their mark.  Cookie had 3 league 200 games.  Tso is a frontrunner for Rookie of the Year.  PB & J has been climbing the ranks, throwing her world domination ball.  I think they will survive a serious test and advance 9-6.

#13 Nuts (-7) vs #4 No-Eye-Deer: After seeing all the prognosticators penciling them in for the final 8, Nuts may have forgotten they had to actually earn it.  They ran into a determined Shambles team that had them rattled at 5-5 in the first round, but ultimately survived it and now are fully focused on the game at hand.  Bustah played well, losing 220-206 to Gutter Slut in an epic battle, but averaging around 190.  Salty Nut was the surprise, rolling well over his average.  Herbie La Nut is a strong #2 behind Bustah, while Sugar and Peanut form a potent one-two ladies’ punch.  Smokey also played well in his one game, but I don’t know how the rotation will work this week.  They should be fine.

Shifter Pawl has led his ragtag bunch to a division title and the Sweet 16 in their first season.  So what if it was the NFC West of BoPo, a title is a title. They will be heavy underdogs tonight against a seasoned Nuts squad that played a brutal schedule.  Shifter Pawl will have to roll strikes and avoid getting hurt in any Bustah sleeper holds between frames.  After him it’s anyone’s guess.  Disillusioned former Nuts owner Deez Nuts should play with extra motivation.  Hello Kritty has been getting a lot of nines…she’ll need a little luck to get that last pin down.  I think this is the end of the road for No-Eye-Deer, but an excellent beginning for the franchise.

8:30 Games

#5 Off Constantly (-3) vs #21 Young and the Bowled: After watching the six o’clock games, I suggest holding onto your seats for this one.  Everyone on both teams thinks they are winning, and that can’t happen.  What can happen is thrilling BoPo playoff action.  Off Constantly crushed Y&B early in the season, but then Y&B went out and signed The Truth.  He has been a revelation (except on ass-slash night).  He also has become the poor man’s Dr. Thunder with his look at me post-roll screaming.  He teams with Pistol Pete to form one of the better 1-2 tandems in the league.  Pistol is coming off a devastating collapse in Restaurant league which would impact his confidence.  Captain Lou Dawg will have to keep him loose.  Senator ITZ picked up the game deciding spare in the 10th frame last week and has been consistently hovering around 160 - a solid three.  All-Star lucky leads the ladies, and the bench is stacked with R R, Anya Caboose and the Irish Scotsman.  Lou Dawg has them believing.

Off Constantly has faced many teams over the years that thought they had a chance, only to rip their hearts out.  Oz never shies away from new challengers and he looks to battle The Truth all night.  McQueen has been the forgotten hero of this team quietly posting their second best average.  Dick Liquor and Number One trade off as the three, and Tron is trying to get himself back in bowling shape after missing a lot of the season.  Last week the OC lovelies, Coucou and Honey Bunny, played very well.  They’ll need to repeat that to keep the door shut on the hard charging challengers.  OC is not sleeping on this opponent, and in the end that should be the difference.  They have the experience and talent to advance, 9-6.

#6 I.B.S. (-3) vs #22 Incredibowls: Everyone keeps taking shots at IBS, but they are still alive, and even favored again.  Captain Wut What and team Face Oolie have thrived on the critics’ attacks, and are playing with an ‘us against the world’ mentality that is serving them well.  What is concerning is the precipitous dropoff of the controversial Killer B.  The late season addition came into the league with a big splash, but has been in decline ever since.  Maybe he’s just playing possum.  Maybe he hated, on this team especially, being thought of as #2.  The Ram Bros. are always good for a big game or two, and perhaps this is the week one of the IBS women makes a name for herself.

The Incredibowls are at it again.  This team underperforms in the regular season but are becoming known for unlikely playoff runs.  They survived a mid-match lane change and a 6-4 deficit to reach the Sweet 16.  Now they are very confident going up against IBS.  Sweet Baby Lou is their leader, and is generally good for a 170 playoff average.  That may not be good enough for top point, but they have the potential to pick up a lot of the lower points.  Boston needs to rediscover the throw that got him a league 200 this year.  Red Hot Hands Ryan, Shibbs and Leave Blank are playoff proven.  Poops and Boobs were out last week, so not sure what to expect from them.  If they play this right, the Incredibowls have upset potential.

#7 B.E.E.R. (-3) vs #10 Sweet Rolls: The absences keep mounting for B.E.E.R.  First the Bishop (baby), then Cheddar (elbow) now Tom Richards (town council meeting in Massachusetts) all out.  That leaves four, and Hungus, Filthy, Queen Bee and newcomer Coco Lopez will have to keep the title defense alive on their own.  Luckily for B.E.E.R. fans all are rolling pretty well recently.  That said, having only four players could be tough against a very game Sweet Rolls crew.

The Sweet Rolls opened some eyes last year when they were tied with Binga’s 5-5 in the quarterfinals.  They are not afraid of the big stage.  They look to have their full complement of players - and can roll an imposing lineup of Candy Man, Hot Tamale, Swiss Cake and Frenchie.  That is a dangerous quartet.  This game could be surprisingly close.  If it is, expect to see the very injured Cheddar pleading to enter the match.

#9 Still L.O.S. (-9) vs #8 Roll Another: Roll Another survived.  Facing what looked like a sure tie and roll-off, Bones picked up a game winning spare in the tenth frame of game three to advance.  An elated Chupacabra quietly said “cool”.  Now they advance to play an angry powerhouse, and will try to ride that surface calm to a big upset.  Uncle Buck has gathered a lot of attention (though he doesn’t want any) for his fascinating release.  He will have to come up huge to keep this one close.  Chup will need his 170’s, not his 105’s and all-star Smutty will need to step up.  Bones and the Package just need to pretend it’s game three, tenth frame every frame.

Still L.O.S. just has to keep from looking ahead to a possible Thursday showdown with the Walkways.  As much as they’d love it, they need to take care of business here first.  There’s not a lot to break down for the heavily favored squad.  This is another chance for Double Cheese and Speedboat to get some more playoff experience.  I think they will cruise.