Last A lines

Last week of the season with a few playoff seedings yet to be determined. It was nice of Hungus to give the 2 division champs the last week of the season off to rest up for playoffs… Always thinking ahead.

EARLY

Oddballs (5-6) -15 vs. Spare of the Dog (2-8)
The Dogs are just trying to run out the clock on this season. They’ve already forfeited the playoffs and half their team doesn’t even show up. Hopefully they’ll be happier on Thursday next season… Oddballs are coming off a complete spanking from Yahtzee and are looking to head into the shootout on a positive note. HBK crushed pins in the City tourney this past weekend leaving Brooklyn wondering where the fuck that has been all of BoPo. A win here and in the shootout could set up a nice match with LOS in round 2.

Saucy Posse (10-2) -3 vs. BEER (7-4)
BEER has been on fire lately. Tommy Gunz has skyrocketed up to #2 in avg. Hungus and Brandy are also finding their lines at the right time too. Unfortunately the only team hotter right now is Saucy Posse. Splinter has been murdering pins and Hot Sauce almost looks like he knows how to bowl again. Saucy really has nothing to bowl for here as they are locked into the #2 seed. With a BEER win, they get into the #4 spot, which looks like the “easiest” road to the semis right now. Saucy has just been too hot lately to think they’re going to slow down now though.

Hazzard (1-10) -3 vs. Ball That (2-9)
Dumpster fire match of the week! Ball That somehow has 2 wins (Dogs and Cape Fear I think?) in spite of the fact that they’d be 5th in avg on Tuesday B… They’re technically not in last place just yet but probably will be after tonight. Hazzard has 2 of the best bowlers in the league but only 1 win. They’re always a dangerous team to face in the playoffs and it looks like they may be in Yahtzee’s region. Now that I think about it… General and LB probably won’t show up tonight because they’re still drunk from Sunday and Ball That wins.

LATE

Cape Fear (5-6) -1 vs. Off Constantly (3-8)
OC tried BEER’s strategy of rolling 8 different people against Saucy and hoping to confuse the shit out of them and make them bowl bad… It failed miserably. Cape Fear has been quietly rolling well the last few weeks. The Paws made a strong run in 2v2 and Soccer Dad/Dentist almost pulled a big upset. I generally have shitty luck when I pick these assholes to win so, sorry if I jinxed you.

Sharks & Strikes (7-4) -5 vs. Binga’s (4-7)
Binga’s have been on the struggle bus lately, but I will blame that on all these early matches. This is a team that rolls better late because they can take their sweet ass time and have all the safety meetings they want and only piss off one team, not 3. Rumor has it that Sharks have some weird fucking Pedro Cerrano shrine and may sacrifice a live rastafarian tonight. I also noticed on FB that Kar Bomb won like everything this weekend leaving White Russian in awe and thinking “Where the fuck has this shit been all season?”. Sharks are battling for that #4 seed as well and they should get it after tonight.

XXX Club (8-2) -7 vs. SOD (6-5)
SOD has done a great job of being completely median this season. Middle of the road in wins, avg and points. Seems like they’ve put on the cruise control. Club has the 2 losses to the only 2 teams that should be allowed to beat them. Bucky is looking to lock up top douche and set the avg record that everyone expected him to set (he needs 454 assuming he rolls 2 and he’s a 227 avg late). I’m sure GlossyJack will be watching this closely. I think if Buck beats him, he should be allowed to chop off the manbun samurai style. Anyway, Club wins in 2, Minor still sucks, blah blah blah