#3 Guns of Brighton 10.5 #18 Tequila Mockingbird 4.5: This game was much closer than the score.  G.O.B. let up after a quick 5-0 lead, but had a tremendous final three frames to bury the Riggs-less M’Birds and stay undefeated.

#5 YAY! 13.5 Lesbowlians 1.5: Lesbowlians rolled well enough to beat almost any other team, but YAY! was on fire, averaging over 600 to stay undefeated setting up next week’s battle for first with GOB.

Wrecking Balls 9 Madbotts 6: Madbotts were on the verge of their first win, but the Ramblin Wreck battled back from 6-4 down to win 9-6.

Snakes On A Lane 10 Pud’s Taxi 5: Snakes picked up their second win on the season, breaking a 5 all tie with a big 5-0 win in the third game.

Lovernauts 11 #7 TDYOB 4: In perhaps the biggest upset in BoPo regular season history, the 13 point underdogs bowled their best game in franchise history, sprinting out to a 10-0 lead and knocked TDYOB from the ranks of the undefeated.

ICBING 14 Goldilocks & The 5 Spares 1: ICBING won their third straight to move over .500, but were more excited about watching their rivals lose on the lane next to them.  Goldilocks set up a battle with Madbotts next week between the last two winless Thursday teams.

#15 BUI 9 #20 UREA! 6: BUI overcame a 3-2 hole, a captaincy change and a stellar game from Knuckles to knock off UREA!

#19 Happy Hands 10.5 Five O’Clocks 4.5: The Hands broke out the new, racy shirts, jumped out to a 7.5-2.5 lead, then held off a determined 5 O’s to pick up another win, moving to 4-1.

Early Action

#5 Yay! (4-0) -11 vs Lesbowlians (1-3): Yay! is of course a heavy favorite, but noone on either team is as hot as Tilt-A-Whirl.  She rolled a 220 last week and has shot up to the 12th.  She can steal a few points.

Snakes On A Lane (1-3) -5 vs Pud’s Taxi (1-3): Pud’s has rallied from two forfeits to split the two games where they’ve shown up.  Snakes was picked to be a contender this year but are in danger of falling out of contention.  They need this one more , so I think they’ll get this one.

Wrecking Balls (2-2) -11 vs Madbotts (0-4): The Wrecking Balls’ top roller rolled one week and disappeared, leaving his name near the top of the averages.  Clever confidence building move.  They also feature up and comer Dude Jr, whose young concentration may be tested by the fishnets and dance moves of the Botts.  The Botts should get a boost from playing early and getting groovy music.

#4 G.O.B. (4-0) -5 vs #18 Tequila Mockingbird (2-1): Interesting game here.  G.O.B. are the new kids, and they’re feeling pretty good about themselves with a 4-0 record, #3 ranking, and 2nd highest average in the whole league for Mr. Pickles.  They are new, so they don’t know the proud history of DHD, the old name of Riggs’ squad, which made the first two BoPo finals.  These are proud veterans, and if Harlyn P makes a slight adjustment tonight, this could be quite a match of old vs new.

Late Games

#15 B.U.I. (3-1) -5 vs #20 UREA! (3-1): UREA! is in disarray.  Those who showed last week had no idea the whereabouts of their captain J-Bird or their star T-$.  Hopefully it resolves itself in they show up.  B.U.I. has the advantage of all bowling together in league on Wednesdays to warm up for Thursday’s league games.  They are two pins from being undefeated.

#7 TDYOB (4-0) -13 vs Lovernauts (0-3): Lovernauts may not realize it, but they’re actually really going to like TDYOB.  This should turn into a booze fueled dance off early.  Shots!

ICBING (2-2) -9 vs Goldilocks (0-3): ICBING has won two straight and look to move over .500, even though they say they haven’t been having as much fun.  Oh, and don’t crowd them.  Ms. Manners says ‘please allow three-five minutes after a game ends before moving down to the lanes for game two.”  Goldilocks is likely looking ahead to a week 6 matchup against the Madbotts.

Happy Hands (3-1) -5 vs 5 O’Clocks (1-2): Should be a low energy, very friendly affair.  The Hands look to rebound from their first loss. 5 )’s should know that we have three new dinner specials, so see you for dinner!

Roll Another (1-2) -1 vs Balls of Fury (1-2): Fury disproved me last week, looking happy and relaxed.  Probably the return of Bacon, Bacon makes everything better.  Roll Another is due to pull off a few wins and quietly sneak back up the rankings.

N.E.D. 7.5 - Pinups 7.5: Shifter Pawl picked up his 2nd bowl-off win in three weeks, this time over Beaujolais, to move NED to a shocking 4-1 record.

#16 Saucy Posse 8 - #4 Still L.O.S. 7: SauPo jumped out to a 5-0 lead behind Redonk’s 245, before LOS rallied to tie it 5-5 behind Mr. Stiffy’s 212.  SauPo pulled it out 3-2 in the final set to get the upset and continue their up and down season.

Splits Happen 10 - Bowlderdash 5: Splits came back from a 3-2 hole to win this battle of formerly winless teams.  Welcome to the win column, Splits.

#2 Walkaways 12 - #11 Cunning Linguists 3: The Walkaways managed to stay awake in a rare night game, and pulled away with a 5-0 game 3.

#10 Pinny Candy 11 - Three Livers 4: Surprising PC stayed unbeaten with a 5-0 game three to keep 3L winless.

#6 Back in Black 12 - #9 Off Constantly 3: BIB dug a 3-2 hole, but then grabbed the next 12 points in a big win over OC.  BIB will move back up the rankings, setting up another big showdown next week vs. #1 BEER.

#8 Binga’s 12.5 - #12 Turkey Club 2.5: Binga’s cruised in a party atmosphere over the expansion Club kids.

#1 B.E.E.R. 15 - D-GUTS 0: Not much to report here, other than tequila shots and Slow Roll winning the 50/50.

#17 Incredibowls 8 - Nutz 7: The cardiac-bowls won their third straight 8-7 match, battling back in the third game with 3-5 points to eke out the win and keep Nutz winless.

Early Games (should be some excellent, close matches)

My Balls (1-2) -1 vs I.B.S. (1-3): My Balls almost did the impossible last week.  They only brought three players, yet got out to a 3-2 lead.  They got three again in the last game and lost a close 9-6 match.  Maybe that gives them some momentum.  I.B.S. has been on a different trajectory, losing three straight after a big win to open the season.  Both teams need the game - it may be early but the April Fools’ shootout is looming.

Pinups (1-2) -1 vs N.E.D. (3-1): Pinups have been finding ways to lose, N.E.D. has been finding novel ways to win (including a bowl-off).  The Pinups are a game and a half behind N.E.D. even though they have a 20 pin higher average.  Bulj Temptingly has at least been tearing it up on the Smack Talk board.  Here’s their chance for a ‘power win’.

Bowlderdash (0-3) -1 vs Splits Happen (0-4): Here we go, someone gets to taste sweet victory for the first time this week.  Bowlderdash has been achingly close, losing in a bowl-off.  Splits hasn’t been close yet but this is a great opportunity for them.  Call me a communist, but I’m hoping everyone gets a win this season, so I’m glad someone gets off the schneid tonight.

#4 Still L.O.S. (3-1) -5 vs #16 Saucy Posse (2-2): No team has made more noise early than L.O.S.  Back to back wins over OC and Back in Black will get you noticed.  Now we’ll see how they cope with success.  They are heavy favorites against a solid but unpredictable SauPo squad.  SauPo was bad last week, and are looking to show that they are still relevant.  Their schedule doesn’t let up, so they’ll simply have to step their game up.  They’re certainly capable.

Late Games

#17 Incredibowls (3-1) -3 vs Nutz (0-4): I couldn’t have imagined this line when the season started.  The Incredibowls have been pulling out surprise wins and have edged into the top 20.  The Nutz haven’t found anything yet.  Bustah showed his old form in practice, so may be back.  Peanut is solid and Hootie’s throw is looking great.  At some point they should be able to pull it together.  Despite the 0-4 start, theu actually have a 10 pin higher average than Incredibowls.  They need this one to start turning the season around.

#6 Back In Black (3-1) -1 vs #9 Off Constantly (2-2): Easily the game of the night.  The defending champs OC finally started practicing after a 1-2 start, but after last week’s win disappeared again.  Back In Black has been coming from behind all season, but last week they dug too big a hole and lost their first game 8-7.  The good news, Bama grinned.  The bad news, Stevie Strikes ripped into his team in post-game press conferences, and Gutterboy has yet to show up.  This game is huge for both teams.  BIB doesn’t want to head into next week’s BEER showdown on a two game losing streak, and OC can’t imagine starting 2-3.  Can’t wait to watch this one.

#2 Walkaways (3-1) -5 vs #11 Cunning Linguists (3-1): Rough timing for the oralsexuals.  They are on a roll, winning three straight and knocking off big name teams, but they catch an angry Walkaways squad.  The Walkaways lost in a bowl-off on a night when they outscored BEER by 80+ pins.  Had they won, they may have gone into this game a bit complacent.  Now, they are too focused.

#1 B.E.E.R. (4-0) -11 vs D-GUTS (1-2): B.E.E.R. is riding high, probably literally, after their thrilling victory last week.  They get D-GUTS in the week between Walkaways and Back In Black.  Queen B was clutch last week, getting 1 1/2 points while having to play all three games.  For D-GUTS, this is a good chance to measure themselves against some of the league’s iron.  They could gain some momentum by putting a scare in B.E.E.R. It is also a battle of Gorham, with Slow Roll vs Captain Collection, Pot Loughran and others.

#10 Pinny Candy (3-0) -3 vs Three Livers (0-3): Upset alert?  Maybe.  Three Livers are veterans, and Bernie has been rolling extremely well.  They are hungry for a win.  Pinny Candy is the surprise of the early season, and is one of only two undefeated teams on Tuesday.  The averages of these teams are surprisingly close given their respective records.  Skittles has been huge for PC, but Wilma is a veteran with a history of clutch performances.  This could be a great match.

#8 Binga’s (2-2) -5 vs #12 Turkey Club (3-1): The Club Kids have been on a roll, winning three straight after a razor-thin loss to OC to start the season.  Now, however, they hit the meat of their schedule, and won’t be favored for weeks.  Binga’s has been shockingly inconsistent, but have put up some huge numbers despite their 2-2 start.  Last week they crushed SauPo 14-1.  If Tso can stay up late enough, they should cruise to victory.

Early Games

#18 B.U.I. (2-1) -3 vs #16 Happy Hands (3-0): B.U.I. rebounded nicely after letting a win over TDYOB slip away in the last frame.  Now they get another shot at an unbeaten team.  The Hands are riding high with their best start in franchise history.  Marv has been golden, and now they are due for a big game from Sasha Northfield.  This would be their biggest win to date if they could pull it off.

Roll Another (1-1) -1 vs ICBING (1-2): ICBING is coming off their first win but it was against a team that wasn’t being friendly or having fun.  Roll Another will be quietly friendly and having quiet fun, so ICBING may not have the focus to pull this one out.  Roll Another has had two weeks to think about their loss and are likely out for redemption.  Should be a nailbiter.

#5 Yay! (3-0) -7 vs #20 Wrecking Balls (2-1): This looks like a gimme for Yay, as the Wreck will be without top bowler Swing again.  The Dude picked up his game a bit last week, and Clark showed improvement, but Yay! rolls too many decent bowlers to have any weak spots against them.    Ralphie has been quiet…too quiet.

Guacabowle (1-2) -3 vs Balls of Fury (0-2): Guacabowle is only in their first year, but seem a bit ahead of 2nd year Balls of Fury in terms of getting the BoPo spirit.  This will be a good chance for the Furious ones to get that shine back, let loose, and have a few laughs.

Late Games

#17 Sweet Rolls (2-1) -11 vs Goldilocks (0-2): Rough start for the Goldilocks with just one point in two games but they’ve had a week off to lick their wounds and get their heads right.  Tough draw for them after the bye week with Sweet Rolls, however, as the sugary crew are starting to get hot.  Caramelize!

#4 Guns of Brighton (3-0) -5 vs Snakes On A Lane (1-2): It’s been a big week for Mr. Pickles, putting up his first league 00 to lead his team to victory, then tying for bowler of the week with a 236.  Let’s see if Thursday’s new top dawg keeps it up.  He faces a hard to figure Snakes squad that got smoked by TDYOB last week, but seem better than their record.  Too many Dr.s on that team not to heal themselves.

Lesbowlians (0-3) -5 vs Madbotts (0-3): Someone’s getting a win!  Lesbowlians have been closer and have a much higher average, so I’m going with them.  This may be the first BoPo game featuring all women.

5 O’Clock’s (1-1) -3 vs Pud’s Taxi (0-3): Last week Pud’s sent a shockwave accorss the league by showing up.  This week they look to make it two in a row.  Waiting for them will be the 5 O’s, who set a great example for the league by meeting up early at Bayside for team dinners.

#7 TDYOB (3-0) -3 vs #8 UREA! (3-0): These teams have vastly different attitudes about winning, but both are 3-0, so it is de facto a big game.  UREA! is happy to be here, and they do have an all-star in T-$.  Knuckles has quietly been a huge factor.  Nothing quiet about TDYOB.  They want this game badly.  Space Farmer could be their cosmic glue guy.

#2 B.E.E.R. 7.5 #1 Walkaways 7.5 (Hungus over Booth in bowl-off)

#14 Turkey Club 14 Splits Happen 1

#6 Still L.O.S. 8 #3 Back in Black 7

#11 Off Constantly 12.5 Nuts 2.5

#9 Binga’s 14 #13 Saucy Posse 1

#12 Pinny Candy 12 Pinups 3

Y&Bowled 11 D-Guts 4

Incredibowls 8 #10 Strikes of Hazzard 7

No Eye Deer 9 My Balls 6

http://contests.thephoenix.com/thebest/portland/2012/noms/

#14 Turkey Club (2-1) -7 vs Splits Happen (0-3): Tango is getting into the trash talking community, and the rest of the Club is getting settled into the league.  They should take advantage of this one as they won’t be favorites again til March.  Splits Happen may not be favored all year, so may as well go for the upset now.

#3 Back in Black (3-0) -3 vs #6 Still L.O.S. (2-1): Most weeks this is game of the week material.  BIB has been surviving without excelling, but they are 3-0 and Stevie Strikes is finding his groove. LOS is coming off a huge confidence boosting win over Off Constantly, but word on the street is that Precious and/or Double Cheese will miss the game.  No Cheese, no win.

#1 Walkaways (3-0) -3 vs #2 B.E.E.R. (3-0): The Walkaways handed B.E.E.R. its only regular season loss last year, and it was convincing.  Ultimately, they fell short of the finals and BEER lost in the finals, so it wasn’t particularly impactful.  In the offseason Walkaways cut La Gagita and added Valley Gurl Jess and The Dentist.  So far so good - undefeated and not really challenged.  B.E.E.R. is rolling without Slow Roll, but Tom Richards is back and he has a knack for big games against these guys.  Cheddar is the hottest bowler in the league right now.  The Walkaways depth should be the difference in this game, but they will see each other again.

#15 Cunning Linguists (2-1) -5 vs I.B.S. (1-2): I.B.S. is a bit backed up these days.  They got off to a hot start but have now been pumelled in back to back games.  That said, after this week they will likely be favorites for their next five games.  This game may play into their hands a bit as they are the distractors, and aren’t easily distracted.  The Linguists finally played to their talent level last week and upset Binga’s by a wide margin.  Now we’ll see if they can handle success.

Late Games

D-Guts (1-1) -1 vs Y&B (0-3): Hard to judge D-GUTS yet.  They won big when they had their whole team, lost big when shorthanded, then had a bye week.  They would love to get some momentum back before facing BEER next week.  Y&B are really hurting.  Something needs to change for them fast.  Lou Dawg could reappear in his motivational short shorts, or Pistol Pete could recover.  They have a chance here and probably need a win more than any team in the league.

N.E.D. (2-1) -1 vs My Balls (1-1): Another game that should be a good one.  NED is coming off a thrilling bowl-off victory, and hope that carries over.  They aren’t getting much from any bowler not named Shifter Pawl yet, though Donzarelli has looked good in practice.  My Balls may have their Captains back (not sure), and those Captains would love to get a win for new baby Ham.

#12 Pinny Candy (2-0) -5 vs Pinups (1-1): The Pinups have a ‘power win’ in their minds, and have proved a feisty group of commenters.  Now they need to translate that feistiness to bowling.  Pinny Candy could quietly go to 3-0 and be one of the last undefeateds standing.

#10 Strikes of Hazzard (2-1) -5 vs Incredibowls (2-1): The Strikes have really been playing well, and had they not let a 6-4 lead against BIB slip away last week would be sitting in the top four.  They need to stay focused after back to back games against top 5 teams.  The Deputy has been a great free agent pick up for Uncle Jesse.  The Incredibowls had a wild win last week, getting last place all three times and sneaking out an 8-7 vcitory.  A win here would get them in the top-20.

#9 Binga’s (1-2) -3 vs #13 Saucy Posse (2-1): This should be a very entertaining matchup.  Do you prefer the herb-infused Rasta vibe of Binga’s, or the hard working/hard drinking vibe of SauPo?  I like both, personally.  These are original teams going at it.  I’ll take Binga’s this week because they kind of dropped the ball last week and need the win more.

#11 Off Constantly (1-2) -7 vs Nutz (0-3): After another loss it occurred to OC they are going to have to work a bit this year if they want to win.  This week they finally started showing up to practice.  That is probably bad for the Nutz.  The Nutz need their whole roster to show up to have a chance.  OC is vulnerable, but the Nutz need their best game of the season.

Early Games

Tequila Mockingbird (1-1) -10 vs Pud’s: Third time the charm for Pud’s?  They have promised to be back again, but this time the very life of their franchise is on the line.

#10 Guns of Brighton (2-0) -5 vs Guacabowle (1-1): The Guac’s picked up their first win and still pop collars.  G.O.B. definitely follows different fashion guidelines.  They are eager for a real opponent after ‘beating Puds’ last week.

#17 Happy Hands (2-0) -5 vs Lesbowlians (0-2): Happy Hands is uncharted waters for the franchise, and have a legitimate shot at starting 3-0 for what I assume is the first time.  The Lesbowlians are in uncomfortably familiar waters, trying to snap a losing streak.  This could be an interesting matchup as the averages of the teams are actually quite close.

B.U.I. (1-1) -3 vs #16 Wrecking Balls (2-0): BUI lost in the last frame last week or they’d still be ranked.  They look to exact some measure of revenge against the undefeated, if untested, Wrecking Balls.  Unfortunately for the Rambling Wreck, their top bowler will only be playing every other week, and this is not one of those weeks.  The Dude needs to have a big night.

Late Games

#11 TDYOB (2-0) -3 vs #15 Snakes On A Lane (1-1): TDYOB has been narrowly escaping, but they will be fired up for a frisbee battle.  I know, I know, the Dr. seems like an even-keeled guy who doesn’t get too up or down, but trust me, quietly he wants this win.  The Snakes hope that Honey Badger’s league leading average isn’t a fluke, and also, importantly, that he is actually bowling this week.

#5 Yay! (2-0) -9 vs Five O’s (1-0): Yay! looks to throw their weight around and stay the unquestioned top dawg for Thursdays.  The Slam Pigs have certainly proved a good fit for BoPo, and Ralphie and Mona have only experienced BoPo success. The 5 O’s are coming off a bye week, and walking into a buzzsaw.

Sweet Rolls (1-1) -7 vs Lovernauts (0-2): The Lovernauts will try to work their wiles on the last of the straight ballers.  Sweet Rolls have a chance to sneak back in to the top-20 with a win.  The Lovernauts need Rufio’s bowling magic to balance out their general dance move magic.  Also, Satchel needs to take just a tiny bit off that looper.

#19 Balls of Fury (0-1) -3 vs ICBING: The Furious ones look to justify being the only ranked team with no wins.  They’ve had a week off, and now all know what league they bowl in, so I like their chances.  ICBING seems to have lost their way a bit on the lanes, but are heroically leading the pack when it comes to doing shots.  That alone may move them back in to the top-20 in our hearts.  Kamikaze!

#7 UREA! (2-0) -11 vs Madbotts (0-2): UREA! rapid ascension should provide hope to all struggling franchises.  Overnight they have gone from the bottom of the barrel to a top 10 team staring at a 3-0 start.  The Madbotts don’t really care about all that, they are more focused on looking good, which they are accomplishing nightly.